W. K. Buckley
Hell Radio in Arkadia
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(cue 1) sing it little man in Zeusland/
when you break your chain & look back at your links!
o sing it!
little man: "i love Athene
in the SPRING/time...
i lo vah! Paris in...the...fa a...ill...!"
AND now! coming to you live from
Downtown Little Man Brown!
your host (& mine too)--Amerika's Joy-Girl---!
Heeeeeeere's ATHENE!
(cue 2) "Good even-ing party aniMALS!
Say what?
you say links are breaking in your invisible chains?
are you feeling down? no energy? are your synapses looped?
are you dragging leg?
crying in rooms?
just...can't...seem...to pull that axe from your skull?
are you kicking over trash cans? smacking hats off fat heads?
pulling up flowers by their roots are you [feeling "free"]
& stepping on lawns?
Then try DR PLATO'S NEW PRIMORDIAL HAPPY TABLETS!
& next morning you'll bust out singing
for your neighbors---OOOOH!!!! Kla Sparta! where the wind
comes whipping through our Thebes!
(cue 3) &/ if you act now
(for that very special someone):
"i love Athene...in the Spring time
i love Athene...in the fa..a..ill"
That's right! if you identify SONG from Rock Nothing Live Chicago!
you'll win a sound-proof-BMW with an automatic ice crusher
AND!
you'll get a flly-digital-senso-stereo-aroma-therpeutical-8-track-sing-a-long-with-Calypso!
FREE!!
So get on it Zeusland! Dr. Plato's Eternal Happy Tablets!
(you've got that "everything" to lose)
(cue 4) [one-day-money-back-guarantee-batteries-not-included-some-assembly-required-some-parts-not-available-in
stores-not-rec-for-children-under-14-FDA-approved-only-in-Germany-could-cause-spiritual-longings-not-rec-for-
seniors-over-70-do-not-put-in-pies-if-sore-throat-see-a-rabbi-could-cause-drowsiness-for-those-who-operate-cranes!-
if-accompanied-by-fever-&-rash-take-more-could-turn-heteroes-gay-do-not-administer-to-pigs-might-cause-bleeding-
from-the-big-toe-&-hair-loss-best-taken-with-mil-on-a-NY-subway-by-a-redneck-might-make-newlyweds-suicidal-if-
no-effect-in-3-weeks-eat-broccoli-could-cause-ears-to-grow-bigger-not-rec-for-prom-night-not-sold-to-Catholics-
endorsed-by-the-Baptist-League-of-Tennessee-might-grow-balls-on-a-gelding-available-only-at-Walgreens-should-be-
taken-with-bananas-might-cause-seizures-in-manics-illegal-in-Maryland-should-not-be-taken-with-classical-music
could-cause-thumb-loss-headaches-&-kidney-failure-sold-on-black-market-in-Winnetka-&-no-effect-on-Cheese-Heads]
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